| Most adults know how much to spend on birthday | | | | time, you may be able to save enough to |
| gifts or Mother's Day and Father's Day gifts. We | | | | purchase the wedding gift you would truly like to |
| have a feel for what is appropriate for baby gifts. | | | | give. |
| But when it comes to wedding gifts, how much | | | | U.S. National Average |
| to spend may not be so easy to determine. We | | | | In the U.S., the national averages spent on |
| don't want to spend so little that we look cheap, | | | | wedding gifts fall into 3 categories. Each category |
| but we don't want to spend more than we can | | | | is determined by the relationship of the guests to |
| afford just to compete with other guests. | | | | the bridal couple. |
| Etiquette | | | | 1. If buying for a co-worker or a distant family |
| With wedding gifts, how much to spend seems to | | | | member, guests tend to spend $50-$75 each on |
| be a question of etiquette. Few of us feel totally | | | | a wedding gift. |
| comfortable with the rules of etiquette. In other | | | | 2. Those attending the wedding of a relative or |
| areas of life, society has moved away from such | | | | friend are likely to spend $75-$100 each on a |
| rules. Etiquette books no longer have a place on | | | | wedding gift. |
| our bookshelves. | | | | 3. When a close relative or close friend gets |
| Happily, etiquette books, or at least those who | | | | married, the wedding gift will probably cost |
| read them, have a place on the Internet. By | | | | $100-$150 or more per each guest. |
| researching those sites, you can get a better idea | | | | This may not be appropriate in your town or city. |
| of how much to spend on wedding gifts. You will | | | | It is good to check with peers and learn what |
| want to remember these points. | | | | wedding gifts customarily cost where you live. |
| 1. Negative: Do NOT try to spend according to | | | | Personal Decision |
| what your meal will cost. It is a common myth | | | | With wedding gifts, how much to spend really is a |
| that etiquette's "rule of thumb" is to estimate | | | | personal decision. Guests may give whatever |
| how much your meal might cost and spend that | | | | wedding gifts they choose. You should never be |
| much on a gift. The current (2007) price range | | | | guided by how much you think the bride's family |
| for a meal is thought to be between $65 and | | | | will spend on the meal. You should not be guided |
| $150 per person. If two of you will be attending | | | | by what others might give. |
| together, you would double that amount. This is | | | | Shop for a wedding gift according to what you |
| NOT true according to etiquette. Furthermore, a | | | | think the bride and groom will like, not according |
| recent survey shows that only 10 percent of | | | | to the price tag. If they have registered at a local |
| brides agree with that idea. If followed, it would | | | | store, check the registry. If you see an item you |
| mean that a couple choosing a casual affair would | | | | want to buy and can afford, don't be turned |
| receive less expensive gifts simply because the | | | | away because it is the least expensive item on |
| reception was casual. | | | | the registry. |
| 2. Positive: Emily Post says there is no rule. You | | | | Send Wedding Gifts and End the Competition |
| should let your affection for the bride and groom | | | | Etiquette says wedding gifts are to be sent to |
| guide you, but you should stay within your | | | | the bride's home. They are not to be delivered in |
| budget, and be financially responsible when you | | | | person, either to the home or to the wedding |
| buy a wedding gift. The giving of wedding gifts is | | | | location. If wedding gifts are delivered to the |
| not a competition. Your gift should reflect who | | | | wedding location, the bride and groom should wait |
| you are and your relationship to the bride and | | | | and open them at home in private. |
| groom. If you cannot afford to give as much as | | | | Finally, whether a wedding gift costs $5 or $5,000, |
| you would like, remember that the gift can be | | | | a well-mannered bride and groom will accept it |
| given within the first year after the wedding. | | | | graciously and appreciate the thoughtfulness. |
| Sooner is better, of course. But with that much | | | | |